Sooo Graham Norton

Got home early enough last night to watch V Graham Norton - can definitely see this getting to be a habit. Though tonight I'm out with E/just back from NY for a girl's-night-gossipy-catch-up-with-vodka-thing (OK, we did it last week, too), so I might not get back in time. And Jilly Cooper is tonight's guest. I mean, what does the author of middle-class mild-porn for the gymkhana generation have in common with G? We should be told.

8 May 2002

Did anyone else see Neil Diamond on V Graham Norton last night?

He looked like a cross between Bob Monkouse and someone my Mum and Dad met in the karaoke bar on holiday in Marbella in 1983. That boxy leather jacket! The oh-so-perfect hair! He was so very eighties gameshow host.

But he can still sing. And he went down a storm with the audience.

27 June 2002

Come the revolution, Siouxie Sioux will be the first up against the wall, I tell ya.

I just saw her on V Graham Norton (I know, I know, I've been home two nights on the run and even written about it, but I just looked in my bank account and staying in has to be the new going out. For a while, at least). She looks like someone who works in a bank and has a cool haircut for going clubbing on the weekend.

She's about as fucking revolutionary as my middle-aged next-door neighbour. OK, she still has blacker-than-goth spiky hair, but so do half the models in Trevor Sorbie. It's seventies. It's the look. She lives in France. With her pussies. She sounds for all the world like a Surrey matron retired on the proceeds of her well-managed divorce.

And she had nothing to say. Even when Graham primed her. Another one of my idols shot down. Rant over.

28 June 2002 

Anyone else see Dustin Hoffman on Graham Norton last night? When he called Graham "brave, courageous and humane" I couldn't tell if he was taking the piss or not.

And Graham was truly starstruck - the wasted first three minutes with Graham going "you've been in so many films. sooo many. films," just made me wish I had a TV programme, because I could have taken advantage of the circumstances so much better. I think. But Graham vindicated himself with the great lost-mobile phone in taxi gag, and Dustin truly rose to the ocassion. Method acting, eat your heart out. Or maybe that was method acting. Anyway, Dustin's filming Neverland as we speak, which I'm looking forward to.

And am I the only person who thinks that Graham Norton has a significant influence on the outcome of Big Brother? He's on every night straight after BB3, does a little diatribe, and then it turns out he's a trend forecaster. Duh. How does that work? "Jade got harpooned." "Mock and vote, people, mock and vote." Like, that makes it OK? I like Graham Norton enormously - though I am not familiar with him in any sense of the word - but in any other circumstances, I'd say he's a bully. He's the cool kid with loads of mates and the latest trainers (tr: sneakers) in the playground, and Jade's the fat kid who doesn't make the grade.

27 July 2002

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